Do you ever walk by a mirror, a store window or door and look at your reflections?
Do you mentally point out your flaws? Your messy hair, your textured face, your figure, your clothes?
Why? Why do we constantly tear ourselves down in our heads, when there is an entire world out there doing that for us? Why do we deserve that double whammy?
Or better yet, what if the world was embracing your flaws, and you’re over here bashing yourself? Why are you so against all of these things that make you… well, you?
This used to be me, I’m not going to lie. I used to stare at myself in the bathroom mirror and pick myself apart.
Every. Single. Day.
My anxiety was through the roof. If you have never felt the frustration of not being able to take a satisfying, deep breath, consider yourself lucky. For lack of better words, it sucks.
But then one day it dawned on me: Why was I continuing to practice something that made me so fucking unhappy? Why did I care SO MUCH? Was it because of society and their standards of beauty? Was it social media and how everything and everyone seems so perfect on a screen?
Whatever it was, I decided to change. Not for them. But for me.
I felt like wings grew out from my back and I flew away from all the bullshit. I built up this courage and this mantra within me. Positivity radiated out of me. Negativity was not welcome here anymore.
Now I ask you, why are you feeding the negativity in YOUR life? Is it because you feel worthless? Or insignificant?
Do you surround yourself with individuals, or with caring souls?
If you don’t understand the difference, I encourage you to do some soul searching. You would not believe the amount of people I have lost because they were filling a void in their own lives – they didn’t care about me.
By no means am I saying this transformation will come within a day, or that it is easy to uphold. It has taken me a long time to become this fearless person, and I am a strong believer in “fake it until you make it.”
When you believe you’re bold and act bold, you will BE bold. It’s destiny.
I get asked a lot “Why do you always look at yourself?” And no, it’s not because I am conceited or infatuated with myself.
Truthfully, I just love myself. I love who I have become. I am proud of me – this woman. I am proud of everything she has accomplished, everything she has been through, to get to where she is today.
When I see myself, I see perseverance.
I see courage.
Happiness. Damn, I love that word. I am so happy to BE HAPPY. Is that not enough to love one’s self?
And honestly, I can finally take that satisfying breath again. I don’t feel like I am drowning, or like a pile of bricks had been stacked on my chest. And that feeling is indescribable.
Now, when I look at my reflection, I don’t see a body. I don’t see a face. I see a soul who has overcame so much during her short life on this planet, and she sure as hell ain’t done any time soon.